Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Chapter 102: Sabina Leaves No Trace

Sat, December 12, 2074 11:14 pm: Dewilliker Preparatory Academy, Rawling Hills, Pleasantview

This shallow bank of snow, pock-marked with browning weeds and twigs was the last thing that Sabina Pleasant would ever see. Fog rolled over the hillside, erasing the distance. She dug her naked heels into the raw earth beneath the snow. This was not waiting. This was the quietus, cold and unending. This was where her wants came to die and her along with them.

When she considered it, her entire life had been spent in want-- just one circuitous desire after desire carouseling up and down, decadent and glittering. Even now, she wanted. No matter how hard she tried to divorce herself from her frozen body, the world never eased from view. She wanted death to come like a desperate lover, clawing her free from her shell in search of some deeper intimacy. She wanted to emerge from that shell beloved, exalted. She wanted to be found in the morning propped up against the gate with her snowbound hair tangled around the iron bars. She wanted her death to be a message that only Troy could read.

Troy would mourn with the heart of a reluctant murderer. For him, she predicted wailing and gnashing of teeth. He would break from the silence that so often accompanied his suffering. Then Sabina would come to him, cloaked in light. He would feel her even and most especially when he was alone, when he was weak, when his bullshit veneer began to fracture. He would know how she loved him, and he would take comfort in that. Then someday, death would enfold them both in his immaculate wings, and there would be nothing left to drive them apart.

Footsteps in the snow stop just behind her back. A figure falls to its knees as though collapsing beneath the weight of some insurmountable burden. His hands warm her back through her thick hair, underscoring how cold she truly was.

"What are you doing here?" Her voice cracked from lack of use. With some effort, she pushed herself onto her knees, grabbing the gate for balance though she found that she could not fully close her fingers.

Those black eyes peered at her through the bars, a window into the chasm. Troy also wanted and wanted, so much so that there was nothing to him but the wanting. How she could have ever expected someone like Troy Tellerman-Caliente to give and not withhold, she did not know.

"I heard you calling me," he said. And the fog lifted as though pierced by the rays of an unborn sun. There would be no shelter for Sabina here, nothing to stand between her and the exposed midnight.

"You think I'm a stupid, melodramatic kid for being out here like this." Troy cupped her chin in his hand, brushing her lips with his thumb.

"No," he said. "If I lived above this fence, I would be sitting right where you are. I'm rather fond of this fence." He'd meant it to be solemn, she knew, but it came out so silly that they both laughed. Troy rested his forehead against hers, and everything went still.

Tonight's visit was his admission. It was his oath. It was the I love you that she would never hear. In the morning, only the imprint of his body in the snow would remain, and she would eventually lose that too. Strong winds were coming. They would leave no trace.


  1. That second to last image is one of my favorites of the entire story. It's just so... them.

    And man, I really wish I'd had my high school diaries when I was writing this.

  2. Well, now that Troy's shown up, at least Sabina's not going to kill herself (or "wait for death", as she put it). I hope she goes inside soon.

    I take it this means that Sabina now knows she's pregnant?

  3. I was wondering if you would think that. *shifty eyes* No, she still doesn't know that she's pregnant. She is mopey because, oh woe is her, Troy doesn't want her. But, for the record, she was never really going to kill herself, no matter what she was thinking. She would have eventually gone inside. Other than that, I'm not even sure that it was cold enough for her to have frozen to death.

  4. Jeez, I was just looking around for Bottom Summerdream's new name and came across an interesting fact-- It has been 5 years since you first noticed that Sabina was pregnant almost down to the day. *SIGH* *SIGH* *SIGH* This story. Someday, I will get to all the things that happen in this story.